Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Birthdays: A Change in Pace

Although discussing college and its finer point may be up there in the excitement department next to watching grass grow's cubicle, I've decided for a change in pace, dear reader. Playing along with the 'letters' portion of the title, I'll be posting some birthday letters I've written to friends in the past. I mean, these letters are perfect. They substitute a sappy, expensive card and a sappy, expensive present (in the best of cases, that is). Do enjoy this series!


Yo Mika,

                Happy Birthday! It’s that time of the year when you look back and think to yourself,
“Huh, wow, I was born this day several/few/not so many years ago. Partaaaay!”
So in a sense, this is probably a special day for you. Even if it’s all about the presents (isn’t it always?) and hanging out with friends or whatever, but let me tell you, for me?—all about the food. Definitely. But like I was saying, special day! Birthday! Yaaay! Fun and stuff!... wheeeee.
                One thing I enjoy doing whenever I give someone a present is give them a little note about the present. Which in this case, you are currently reading. If you can read. (I can’t, only write. Tough life.) But as I was thinking and asking advice and texting friends what they would get a girl for their thirteenth birthday, I realized nobody really knew. And at this point, I was forced to rely on my own knowledge and experience of being a thirteen year old girl. So this is when Barbies and the World’s Largest Jelly Bean fell out of play, though I was sorry to be forced to commit such a drastic cut off the potential present list. So, as usual, there was only one viable option: cold, hard, green (though it’s more inky black and faded hempy white) CASH. SALAD. BIG BUCKZ. MULA. DOLLA DOLLA BILLZ, and whatever else you kids call it these days.
But yeah, enjoy your cash. And your birthday, while you’re at it. Though by the time you’re reading this (did I mention I can’t read yet?) it’ll probably be a week later. I put everything off for the last minute too, it’s ok to procrastinate with opening presents. Just kidding, you better be reading this minutes after everyone leaves.

Oh yeah, and happy birthday! God bless, kiddo.


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